Why I Write

If you've been around me for any length of time, you've probably made the same observation as just about everyone else: I don't talk much. In high school, people who knew me referred to me as the quiet kid, and I haven't changed much in that regard since I graduated almost fifteen years ago.

I've always found it interesting that it's the quiet people that seem to stand out like a sore thumb. "Boy, you're quiet." "Why don't you say much?" This is what I've heard dozens of times from people I've just met, or even people that have known me for a while. Why do other people notice this so quickly? I've never understood that. I'm not trying to be a troublemaker. I'm not even trying to be different. I'm just being myself.

But that doesn't always go over well with everyone. We're expected to be talkative, and some people even get offended when we don't. Talking is almost our way of letting everyone else know, "Hey, I'm normal." Those who talk a lot often like to make sure the non-talkative folks know that they're different. Imagine it the other way around. I would never say to a garrulous person, "Wow, you talk a lot!" That would be rude, right?

I understand that, as humans living in a society, we all have to interact with each other. And I understand there are times that talking is necessary. I've even forced myself to get good enough at public speaking that I can teach a 90 minute computer class at work without any notes. But it's not how I'm most comfortable expressing myself. And I know I'm not the only one in the world who's like that.

Some people, when they are interacting in person with others, always have plenty to say. They know how to respond immediately. They're able to come up with answers right on the spot, without taking the time to think about it. There's nothing wrong with that. I think it's great that there are people like that. We need them.

But that's not me. I'm an observer. I need to absorb what's around me. Just because I'm not talking much doesn't mean I'm stupid, or I have nothing to say, or that I don't like you or don't care about a situation. Maybe it's easy to assume that, but it's also wrong. In many social situations, I would rather listen to others than hear myself talk because that's how I learn. But when I take time to reflect on what I see around me and want to make some observations and offer a response, I may want to express it somehow. And writing is how I do that.

When I have points I want to make, I like to take the time to sort them out and get the message as good and as clear as I can. You can't do that through talking; once you say something, it's out there and you can't take it back. Again, some people are fine communicating that way, and I don't have a problem with it. Just respect the fact that I'm not the same as you are.

Communicating is not just how we work with other people. It's how we make sense of the world around us. Writing is my favorite way to do both. It doesn't mean there's something wrong with me. I just like to see what I'm thinking on paper (or on the computer screen) so I can make sense of it and rearrange it so that it best reflects who I am and what I'm thinking.

I've been discussing why writing is important to me personally, but in this talkative world, writing still has a place. It's still an effective way to communicate with large groups of people. If I have a message I want to send out to the world, writing is the best way to do it, whether it's through websites, newspapers, or books (and I've done all three). Though people can get turn on their TV or get on YouTube to hear the news or to view a big speech, the written word is still available and isn't going anywhere.

Even writing between two individuals still has a place. It allows us to have a record of our correspondence that we can go back and look at again and again. We can read messages that we write to each other over and over, so we can absorb them and appreciate the other person for taking the time to do that.

But the biggest difference between voice/pictures and writing is that the latter requires use of imagination. I think that's why a lot of people are disappointed when Hollywood turns a book into a movie; more often, I hear that the book was better. When we read words, we have to visualize what the writing is describing in our heads. Television, for instance, does that for us. Our brains don't have to work as hard. When we read, whether we realize it or not, we're becoming better communicators. I'm proud of the fact that, through writing, I can even help others in this way.

Not everyone has to be a good writer. If you have other skills, be proud of them and use them to the best of your ability. But if you see someone who isn't talking much, don't make them feel bad about it. It's easy to do, even if you don't mean to. Quiet people often have a lot to say and have a lot going on in their brain and prefer to express it in different ways besides trying to impress everyone with their verbal skills or their ability to be loud.

And to all the non-talkative people reading this who prefer to write: Keep writing. Practice and get better at it. Find ways it can be useful. And most importantly, don't feel bad about who you are. The world needs all types of people, even if some of us aren't willing to acknowledge that.